Weekday Update with Stacia Chavez

It's been a while since I've given a little update on the family.  Actually, it's been about 7 months!  So I'll get right to it... (by the way, this is probably going to be interesting only to me and Juan, and maybe the kids when they grow up, so I'm not writing to entertain the occasional reader.  Sorry.)

Ezra has been doing some major developing.  He's finally over his sickness and back to his usual cheery self.  Crawling up stairs has been a favorite activity of his, with much hesitation on my part.  Of course, I'm right there behind him as he does it in case he falls, but I can't help but think the kid is going to figure out a way to ditch Mom and try it without a "safety net".  He's trying to form real words right now.  Don't misunderstand, he's definitely not talking yet, but he's realizing that he can control sounds by forming his mouth a certain way.  It's pretty interesting to see that lightbulb working in his mind as he grows and tries new things.  He's started heading into the Separation Anxiety Stage now, too.  It's not as bad as it was for the girls, I think, but it's enough to make him cry himself to sleep at bedtime.  He loves to be chased and tickled and he's quite the cuddly boy when he wants to be.  He "dances" any time he hears a beat or music.  The kid has rhythm too.  We've got to get him into some kind of music class just as soon as he's old enough.  He's also going through a huge growth spurt right now.  Last night we fed him dinner and a 4 oz. bottle around 6:00.  At 8:00 we fed him an 8 oz. bottle right before he went to bed for the night.  At 11:00 he woke up screaming.  We thought it was just a bad dream, but since we couldn't console him at all, we gave him another 4 oz. bottle.  He inhaled that and then started crying when he realized it was all gone.  We tried another 4 ounces and after that he drifted back off to sleep.  Then again, around 6:45 this morning he woke up, hungry for more.  The kid is a bottomless pit!

Qiana is going through a bunch of changes that have left Juan and me baffled as to what is the cause and what to do about it.  The biggest change is that she's reverted back to wetting herself.  The  interesting thing is that she gets to the bathroom, sometimes even with her pants down and ready to go, but she just goes right there on the floor less than a foot away from the toilet.  I'm at my wits end trying to figure out how to help her.  It's definitely been a learning curve for Juan and me because we have tried getting really upset with her, talking it through gently with her, making it a game, rewarding her, punishing her... you name it.  Nothing seems to work!  I realize that she's gone through a TON of changes lately, what with three moves in the last 9 months, but I guess I just expected that once she learned how easy it was to just GO, she would stick with that.  Oh well, like I said, we're learning.  She is as hilarious as she ever was, begging to be tickled and faking "Sleeping Beauty" whenever she possibly can.  She loves to tease, as usual, but she's finding more and more joy in being silly and getting giggles out of her brother.  I love how those two get along.  The strangest thing happened about a month ago when I gave her a haircut/trim.  She lost her curl!  Her signature curly hair is gone!  I know it's silly, but I was devastated and felt so guilty for taking that part of her away.  She and Siena just finished up their community ed gymnastics class and although neither of them can do a cartwheel still, I think they both benefitted from having something to look forward to together.  They can be so catty to each other, lately.  I am the worst parent because no matter what I do to stop it, fighting always ensues when they play together.  I just try to enjoy the happy parts of their playtime, and in reality, they are the majority of that time.

Siena teaches me very day that there are little observers in the house.  I will see her act fifteen years older and say things to her sister or doll that only a parent would say.  Today, for example, Qiana was pretending that she was pregnant and when the baby was finally "born" Siena was so excited and said in the cutest "mom voice" that she would love to hold the baby, if Qiana would allow it.  Qiana was a gracious new mommy and handed the baby over to Siena who subsequently crooned over the doll as she gingerly cradled it in her arms.  She said things like, "It is just so adorable! Hi Baby, Hi.... So sweet. Is she talking yet?"  It shocked me when I saw them play dolls at how many motherly instincts those girls have.  Another tidbit of news about Siena is that she is progressing extremely well in piano.  She started taking lessons near the end of November, and she's almost done with her first books.  I'm so grateful that she loves it and plays for fun, even after the 40 minutes to 1 hour of practicing  she puts in every day. We just started an herb garden with the girls and she is keeping a very thorough seed journal.  Involving the children in seemingly mundane tasks brings so much whimsy to my life.

Getting along

Writing her seed observations

First day it reached 70 degrees outside, he got naked time 

Planting

...and just a bunch of random sleep pics. I love naps!

Four wheeling in the San Rafael Swell

This past weekend we went to the high desert of Utah. Oh my. It was incredible! I have always loved that place, but this trip reminded me why. If you have never been to a remote enough place that you wonder when the last person (if any) was there, you need to go to the San Rafael Swell.

There is such a powerful message nature sends you when you are at her mercy. First, we followed a trail into the depths of the Swell, then we explored the country from the dry-ish bed of a river. I was apprehensive that we would get lost, but I eventually learned to trust in my dad, who had been there enough to know how to make "breadcrumb trails" of mental marks along the way. One funny thing happened soon after I first voiced my concern that we were going to either get stuck or lost; after heartily (but kindly) rebuking me for thinking we would get stuck, my dad decided to go through a spot of high water on the four-wheeler--you can imagine what happened. He got stuck and the boys had to tow him out. I only relate that story because from the perspective of the entire group, including him, it was just plain funny and perfectly-timed. My mom and I got a really good laugh, for we love the chance to say "I told you so."

We were brave and took the girls with us, which was such a good idea in hindsight. They handled the long ride (7.5 hours!) very well. I think having so many adults to two girls helped a ton. Mom, Dad, Harper, Juan and myself went on the trip, so it was a perfect-sized group for the kind of ride we took. I think Chad really would have liked it.

Siena is learning about habitats in school right now and soon will be focusing on the desert, so I was able to take the opportunity to give her a hands-on introduction. We took a lot of pictures, so I think I'll let them speak the volumes I have to say.

Here's to Being an Adult

Looking back at my high school yearbooks last Wednesday night got me thinking to those bygone days of being young.  Yours truly is turning 29 this month (which I would have forgotten until about a week before the big day,  but thanks to a harsh awakening kind reminder a couple of days ago, it's now on my brain.) I know, I know... I'm still young, but honestly, this is going to be a hard birthday for me since it's my last Hurrah as a Twenty-Something.  These are some my perceptions of the last three decades of my life:

• 1-12 yrs. old: you can act like a child and expect to have fun. Other people will take care of you. Pretending is still okay.
• 13-18 yrs. old: learn how to act around other people through trial and error. Try to impress. Widen your range of skills.
• 19-23 yrs old: buckle down and try to get through school. Live on scraps. Live it up.
• 24- 29 yrs. old: try a new environment. Learn about humanity. Start a family. Live on a budget. Pretending is okay again.

I don't know what 30 will bring, but I'm a little scared that I will have a belated quarter-life crisis when it happens.  My biggest fears are that I will look back and find that I wasted time, that I didn't care enough, and that I cared too much.  Does anyone else fear this?  I see a train wreck of emotions coming with every tick of the clock, but I really don't know how to avoid it.  Meanwhile, I guess I can just keep chugging along somewhat naively like I have my whole life.

Next topic, but remotely related.

Last night Juan and I went to a dinner with the pre-dental club at UVU.  We were there to share our "vast knowledge" with the group.  I didn't feel unqualified, but it was weird being on "the other side".  I couldn't figure out why I was so nervous until we were driving home.  I realized that those students are heading into some difficult next few years and I was trying so hard to prep them as best as I could with all the information I had.  Juan and I talked a lot about what tools/skills they would need during the application process as well as in school; targeting the married students, we focused a lot on setting the right expectations for themselves.  We were fortunate enough to receive that advice from a mentor as undergrads so were a little more aware of that than we would have been otherwise and it helped us incredibly.  The more I think about it, the more I realize that it's good advice to take through every stage of life.  It's good practice to set goals, but even better practice to accomplish them.  If your habit is to try to achieve something without the proper EFFORT and TIME, chances are it's hardly going to happen.  There is a reason why we are called the Entitled Generation.  You hear all these success stories about startups and while it's awesome that it happened for those select few, it is not generally the case.  The fact is that TINSTAAFL: THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A FREE LUNCH.  If you want it and if it's good, set the goal (or expectation) and then work for it.  Put in the hours, expect to miss out on things, and keep going.  I just wanted those kids to realize that all the successful dentists they see with their nice cars and fancy lifestyles all had to go through sacrifice at some point, whether it was during dental school, after graduation, or both.

But tying it back to first topic: that made me feel old. And given the fact that I just blogged all the advice, I guess I am old--that's totally something an old person would do. 

(Cue the clip of a train starting to derail.)